please tell me the cruelest jokes your father has played on you?
it’s a tie between two for me..
the first one…I lived with my father briefly in the mid west…the first night I got there he sat me down and had a serious talk about tornadoes and safety..he went off on a big thing about how common they were in these parts and how the town has a warning siren and he said …"if you EVER hear that siren this is what you do…please, go and and wait under the crawl space underneath the house…then he showed me this filthy little place underneath the house and told me I would most likely be safe there.. I didn’t think much of it until the next day when my father was at work…and then I heard it…the siren!!!! i almost crapped my pants and flew underneath to this nasty crawl place where I stayed for like an hour, crying and rocking myself back and forth for comfort.
WELL!!! it turns out that the town sounded the siren everyday at noon as a test !!!
oh man… I was sooooooooooo mad when I found out…
and then one time when I was about 9… I heard a knock on the door and my family starts calling that my friend is there and I was in a super bad mood and I was like I’m not coming but they practically forced me to the door and when I opened it my father rushed in with some weird wig on his head screaming "Arrrrrrrrrggggghhh" and attacked me…
I was shaking for like an hour
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7 comments
cocubloo on July 31, 2009 at 2:04 pm
HAHA!! Man what an entertaining family you have!! I LOVE your dads sense of humour BWAAAHAAHAA!
My dad’s never been mean to me (or at least I hope) but my monster mother (I inherited her famed temper) once drove a pencil in my hand, coz I said monkeys live in the kennel and dogs live in the burrow (I was in the 1st grade) it had a sharp point and went right through and I bled for an hour in which she cried all over the place lol! I still have the lead point in my hand and you can still see it. I carry it around proudly HAha!
*gets sinister look on face* ….AND that’s only just what she did to me in 1st grade ….
Oh but that’s not a cruel joke :O
Kelsi J on July 31, 2009 at 2:04 pm
well i was running late for school and he kept saying kelsi get up..and i was like NO! and so he picked me up when I was still sleeping and threw me in the COLD pool. That really woke me up.
Wise Guy! on July 31, 2009 at 2:04 pm
When we were very young and did something wrong or silly he would ask us if our mother had any kid’s that lived…
When I think back on it and remember how it puzzled us it makes me laugh.
He would also tell us that we would wish for horns but die butt headed.
He was a Marine.
thenewmadmax on July 31, 2009 at 2:04 pm
my dad farted in my face when i was laying on the couch once
passionate on July 31, 2009 at 2:04 pm
It was April 1st 1987. I was walking home from school, I saw him drive by and I tried to wave him down, but he didn’t stop, so I continued to walk home. When I got home I went in and I called out to him, no answer, I went in the kitchen he’s laid out on the floor with a knife in his hand, with ketchup all over his face and hands, just everywhere, chairs were turned over I turned to run out of the house and he goes APRIL FOOLS! I never got over that!
Jay P on July 31, 2009 at 2:04 pm
I don’t think my dad could play cruel jokes on me because hes not in the picture anymore…… well I’ll just move onto my grandpa then! when I was in kindergarden, my grandpa gave me this robin’s egg to take care of(even knowing that I was a clumsy little kid he gave it to me anyways!) and he said to me"If this egg breaks today, an evil spirit is going to come up from hell a take you back down because you killed an innocent life." and guess what? It broke! I spent the rest of the day sitting in the school bathroom crying! Than when my mom picked me up from school I was pretty much ready to kill my grandpa for doing that!
when I was seven I was in my room reading my favorite book when my grandpa came in their holding his air gun(it was loaded too!)I wet myself and ran to the area underneath the house until my mom came home. I don’t know if it was a joke but my grandpa was laughing a lot when I came in all filthy and tears running down my eyes…..and for a while he was making fun of my depression, I know it wasn’t a joke but he found someway to make fun of me……
he did a lot of other mean stuff but those are at least two of the three worst things he has ever done to me…… the other one involves my childhood dog(he was my grandma’s dog) he could’ve been helped but know I am scared for life because of what happened to him(it wasn’t a joke it was just really cruel)
Soliel B on July 31, 2009 at 2:04 pm
my dad used to love to scare the living hell out of me when I was sleeping…one time I was sleeping sitting up on the couch and he snuck up in front of my and clapped his hands as loud as he could right in front of my face..well I woke up crying it scared me so bad……and another thing he used to love doing to my and my siblings was in the morning h would take a cast iron frying pan and a big metal laddle and walk into the hallway by our bedrooms and bang them as loud as he could…..
oh yeah…he also did the pouring cold water on us while sleeping thing a few times too….